Toxic Work — Don’t Quit Your Day Job?
People say, “It’s just a job. Don’t let it get to you,” and, “If you quit and you’re unemployed, you’d be trading one stress for another.” Both are true, and worth serious consideration.
But what happens when your job is not just stressful, not just an annoyance you can tune out, but actually toxic? What happens when you realize your job is not only holding you back from fulfillment and happiness, but also interfering with your health?
Before I dig in any further, I have a few disclaimers:
This blog does not refer to any specific job, company, organization, boss, co-worker, or vocation.
I am in no way suggesting anyone quit their job. Leaving one’s job can have serious financial and emotional consequences for you and your family. Quitting a job is a very personal decision.
I am encouraging everyone to reflect on their current relationship between their career and health, and to make their own choice about what is right for them.
Americans spend roughly nine hours a day at their jobs, not including the stressful, and sometimes long commutes to and from the office. Many of us spend five consecutive days a week at work, and sadly, most of us are still doing work, or at least stressing about work, in our few free hours we are not required to be there.
In other words, work is a HUGE part of our lives, and therefore, one we have to acknowledge as a contributing factor in our well-being.
No one ever died from having a few cigarettes here and there, but what if someone were chain smoking 50 hours a week, every week, for many years, with only a few vacation days?
We overlook toxins that are intangible, or non-chemical. But stress (whether from work or people) releases toxic amounts of cortisol in the body, which can interfere with healthy cell, organ, and hormone function, and deteriorate our health. It’s essential we view our job as a critical component of our health and happiness, and take it as seriously as anything else.
Toxicity aside, what about fulfillment? A lucky minority of people have found work that they love, or managed to love the work they do. However, many of us are showing up just for a paycheck. That’s not exactly soul fulfilling. In fact, it can be soul sucking. We should not assume that the absence of fulfillment is benign.
So let’s say you’re one of the many people that either hates or at least tolerates their job. What can you do about it? A lot depends on whether you consider your job downright toxic, or simply unpleasant and creatively underwhelming.
If your job is extremely toxic, it may help to detach yourself from the job. When I found myself getting angry, or too invested in situations that felt anxiety provoking, I wouldn’t get emotionally involved. To put it bluntly, I learned how to stop giving a shit. There are ways you can set up these self-protective barriers, while still getting your work done.
Another method I’ve found helpful is to set clear boundaries for my co-workers, and for myself. I stopped taking any work-related calls on my cell phone (especially outside of working hours) and checking my work email when I was not in the office. When you answer work emails outside of work, you are not only taking on more stress than you’re getting paid for, you’re also letting your co-workers, clients, and supervisors know that it’s okay to expect this from you. Is that the message you want to send?
Part of setting boundaries is also making distinctions within yourself for what you can reasonably tolerate. Where do you draw the line on certain things? What are you willing to put up with, and what is a deal breaker? Although work toxicity is not scientifically measurable or visible, it’s not any less harmful. So, it’s about deciding what level of toxicity you can tolerate, and for how long.
It can also be helpful to check your work gripes at the door. I asked my partner, friends, and family to remind me not to complain about work too much when I was home. Those few precious hours when I could be with people I loved, doing things I actually cared about, should not be tainted with the negativity I brought from the office. A little venting is good, and we all need to do it, but it’s important to set limits so you’re not spending every waking hour thinking and talking about work.
Spend more time focusing on your hobbies and people you love. The more you build up a life you love outside of work, the less emotional and physical energy you will have to get involved in office drama.
The irony of working in toxic conditions is that, when a dissatisfying or stressful career causes us to get sick, we wind up working just to pay our medical bills—bills we wouldn’t even need to pay if our job wasn’t so stressful! It’s a vicious cycle. It’s like you’re getting paid to get sick! To add insult to injury, many holistic care and functional medicine practices are not covered by medical insurance (which is mainly offered through our jobs).
Now you may be wondering, “But what if I like my job? Does any of this apply to me?”
No matter what career you’re in, no matter how much you may like it, there will always be a stress associated with work, particularly if you work full time. The 9-5 work structure is not designed to align with human needs. Having a company tell you how many “sick days” or “personal days” you’re allowed to take is ridiculous! Animals don’t ask for permission when they need to rest; animals rest when they need to. Working 9-5, five days a week with only a few days off every year is not human. Now factor in sitting at a desk all day, staring at a screen. Our bodies are meant to move, be in nature, get sunlight.
Nevertheless, this is the world we live in.
Here are a few things to consider when looking to make a change to your career.
Start by making sure your job is tolerable, at the very least. It may sound silly that I even have to say that, but there are shockingly large numbers of people who work every day at a job they find intolerable. Your job does not have to be exciting or your dream career, but at the bare minimum, it should not be toxic and overly stressful.
Think about what really excites you and lean into it. How can you align what you really want to do with what will pay your bills? It is possible to find both! Keep leaning into things that light you up and don’t be afraid to tell everyone what you’d prefer to do! We don’t get what we don’t ask for.
Consider building your own work outside of “the system.” This can be a bit more complicated and require time, research, financial support, and other moving parts. Not everyone has to work 9-5. Some people have multiple part-time jobs, work freelance, find multiple streams of income, register as an LLC, generate passive income. Some people do not crave or need the same luxuries as others as far as homes or cars. Some people have less debt than others. Take advantage of your talents, interests, support networks, and financial standings to build a career that is not only healthy, but soul-satisfying.